Sunday, September 16, 2007

Going the Distance

I am thinking about running today. I would like to say I am a runner, but these days it is more like I USED to be a distance runner. :) (I hope to change that, but that's another post.) I know and love the process of training hard, running the course and attempting to finish strong- even when you are ready to quit and every muscle in your body is telling you to do that. At that point it really becomes a mind over matter issue to push yourself to the finish when you want to stop.

(Insert my life currently). So much of my life feels consumed with finishing this graduate degree, my time, my energy, my emotional state... A lot of the time I think about just wanting to be done. The past few weeks I have felt really immobilized by having to finishing my thesis and internship hours. Always thinking about wanting to be done does not strengthen me to run keep racing strong. When I look at the whole picture I can see how much is behind me, and that the hurdles in front are possible to overcome. This week I am really going to try to focus on Paul's words: "I have fought the good fight, I have finished the race, I have kept the faith" 2 Timothy 4:7.

When I think back on my cross country days several things come to mind. But- one special memory in particular sticks out. My dad was so faithful to support me. He came to every meet. He was usually at the start, and then would cut across so he could cheer me on as I neared the finish. I could count on him being there, and I could count on him hollering out encouraging words to me. I also knew that no matter what the outcome was of my performance in the race he was always proud of me for finishing- as it was finishing that mattered most. I get a little choked up and teary when I think about this, it means so much to me.

As I am nearing the finish of this part of my life I know there are many people cheering me on as I am struggling to get to the finish line. I know how good it feels to finally finish something. I feel stuck in the mind over matter part-even though I just want to be finished, I want to finish strong. Although sometimes I feel like I just want to quit running and have the struggle be over- I know at the end of this life race my dad will be there, proud as always, DH, and others. I am so thankful for that unwavering love and dedication.
(Just think, less than 4.5 months and no more posts about school!!)

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